Gas Station HaikuGenre: Video Haiku
Rules: Make a haiku that takes place at a gas station! A video haiku is a 3 shot film. 1st shot is 5 sec, next is 7 sec, last 5 sec. Examples: http://bit.ly/s34Fmc
One word: AWESOME!! Okay, and now for several more words. I loved the lighting here. The way our vampires face is lit at the very beginning with that thin strip of light across her face was brilliant. The tone was spot on and the payoff was good. Also, there was some great Foley work done here. The sound totally sold me on the idea that they were on the road.
My only gripe was the cab driver. Don't get me wrong, wonderful performance. I just felt like he was missing something. Namely, the recognition of a vampire in his cab. I felt like he needed some kind of snappy one liner like "Why do the vampires always choose my cab?" or "Damn vampires! Always eating my customers". I know those lines aren't perfect, but you get the idea. Without it, I'm a little confused as to why he's so calm.
This was a great effort, especially considering the crunch time I know you went through. As it stands this one get's a solid "A".
Thanks mate! Really glad you liked it. I wasn't sure how to get across his indifference. The idea is that he specifically picks up monsters and finds them "food." It pays better than a regular cab. He doesn't call attention to it, because it's his job. ;) Thanks for the critique!
Good stuff! The shots were done very well and I loved the tone of this piece. The piano music, I thought, was a very good fit. Gave it a sort of God Father feeling. About halfway through I'd already figured out that the car was probably going to blow up, however, I was very curious as to how you were going to pull it off without going outside the car. The FX were surprisingly well done and the way you handled the car explosion in the end was brilliant as well. Not sure about the awkward transition though. He tries shooting his way out of the car and then passes out? Time passes a little and suddenly the car is filling with flammable gas? I can actually let that stuff slide, but the part I can't seem to let go of is how did he ignite the gas? There was a passage of time there and he didn't fire the gun again, so I'm still wrapping my head around that.
Otherwise, this was a great movie. I give it an "A-"
I love the story here and the performances were great! You kept to the rules and everything played out beautifully. I really loved the POV shot at the end where he shoots the two guys in the front seat and the blood splatters against the windshield. Classic! I must also compliment you on your use of sound. While we never actually see any cop cars, the sound FX were enough to sell me on the idea that they were there. The only thing that stood out to me as needing work was the car chase. I could tell they were moving slow and that they were stopping for traffic which kind of pulled me out of the action a bit. It wasn't horrifyingly noticeable, but definitely something to consider in the future. Having said that, I know it can be difficult shooting a car chase scene on a shoe string budget and a busy traffic day. Because of that, I'm bumping you up to a solid "A".
thank you very much for the great review!!!
I really liked this one. And not just because of the super hot girl dancing at the beginning (though admittedly, it didn't hurt either). I like the quirkiness of this one. There was some definite experimenting going on and that's part of what short film is all about. Getting your feet wet with some editing tricks and sophisticated costuming. I will admit, I am a little confused about the muppet people at the end. Was he really a muppet man imagining that he was a human imagining all these things happening around him or was he a human imagining that he and his friend were muppet men as they were leaving?
Kudos to all the actors on a job well done and especially for the gal at the beginning. I could see her breath which tells me it was freezing out so I can't imagine it was easy to wear that top and dance around like that without freezing her butt. Same to for the guys in the colored outfits. They don't look warm at all :)
Overall this one gets a solid "A".
The idea was that it was a puppet imaging that he was a humain, but it wasn't really clair... ahaha
I was in one of these suit and it was cold as hell!!!! And my girlfriend almost die... ahah
by Noreaster Films
by Noreaster Films
Revenge is a dish best served cold.3,502 views6 reviews21 votes