I like that you used sound loops, but for future use, try mixing it up a little. Set your mood, use them to build tension or emphasize moments.

But you can also go in with post production and use cuts to make up for lack of visual effects. We also work on a miniscule budget, so I am quite used to not having such resources as Skywalker Ranch or Pixar animation. But you can make up for that. Think about how you can fool the eyes and mind into THINKING someone was shot instead of expecting us to just take for granted. In a play is one thing, but on film, you have to deliver more.

Finally, what is WITH that totally f\'ed up picture? The monochrome screen was a nice touch, but if that is what completely destroyed your footage, you are better off not using it. It really detracted from the quality of your end product.

Dialogue was pretty good in places. Action was decent, adn shots were ok. I do like that you used sound to your advantage (instead of having some guy stand behind the camera saying POW!). Overall, I say you did ok for your second try. Concentrate harder on getting your sound levels even, think harder about using your editing to tell your visual story effectively, and find out WHAT HAPPENED to your screen. Other than, solid production.

Cool effect on the opening shot. Is that even an effect? Is that your camera? Man that\'s weird if that\'s your camera. Must be an old VHS thing. Did you do all this dialogue recording in post? You must have ... I don\'t hear any camera noise. If so, GREAT move on your part. Or else maybe you\'ve just got a nice mic.

Ah yeah, second scene, terrible cars noise all over. Maybe just because you were outside.

Lav mics maybe?

Kevlar line could have been delivered a little better.

Try adding in just one flash of white for a gun firing effect. Works better than just having nothing/.

Very confusing, dialogue could use work. Felt like sort of half an idea. Maybe clean the heads on your camcorder? The sound was GREAT for the most part though, so big time kudos on that.

For reference, we had a bit of a problem getting the proper tape/camera conneciton. The footage was recorded some two or three weeks ago on a Hi-8 camera using LP. Our cameraman went on vaction shortly after, and so we lost access to the original camera. We tried desperately to find another camera with both Hi-8 and LP settings. I have a Hi-8 viewcam from some off brand that strangely enough doesn\'t have SP/LP settings but trying to use the wrong framerate completely didn\'t work. The actual footage is captured using an 8mm camera that somehow worked. The audio came out fine, but I was lucky to capture at a point where the color worked. We know what the problem is, and it shouldn\'t happen again.

As for the whole thing seeming like half an idea, the original script is available here: www.xanga.com/Eighth_Day_Labour but due to some directing issues we didn\'t get all the raw footage we needed as we needed it, so certain parts had to be cut.

Wow, I\'m hoping nobody reads the comments before watching the film. I feel like my own criticism could easily ruin someone\'s first impression.

Holy bad resolution Batman! I had to check and make sure there wasn\'t something wrong with my computer when I watched this. Must have been something you guys did with your rendering from the camera? Not really sure.

Yeah unfortunately when I saw this theme, I thought that it\'d be pretty hard to do a successful gangster ripoff / tribute without it feeling kind of fake. I\'ll give you guys points for effort, but ultimately I didn\'t really feel anything here.

Keep on filmfighting!

The filter or whatver is kinda getting annoying. I would use really heavy effects like this only when emphasizing something. Alot of times less really is more.The dialouge is pretty cliche. Why didn\'t the hero just shoot that guy in the face? Also Nothing is explained, a bunch of people just die real quick. A simpler plot explained and executed well is better then a complicated plot that is rushed. I liked some of the camera work.